The person who wastes her life denying herself by a sense of the wrong obligation only diminishes and hurts others. Often, that person exaggerates that sense of obligation to justify his self-rejection. She considers that her obligations absorb her because she fears to look at her life as someone free would do. She feels that, first of all, she has responsibilities towards others and uses that exaggerated obligation to justify her failure to achieve her own potential and as an excuse for not taking risks.The person who wastes her life denying herself by a sense of the wrong obligation only diminishes and hurts others. Often, that person exaggerates that sense of obligation to justify his self-rejection. She considers that her obligations absorb her because she fears to look at her life as someone free would do. She feels that, first of all, she has responsibilities towards others and uses that exaggerated obligation to justify her failure to achieve her own potential and as an excuse for not taking risks. 

Since that martyr does not grow but remains trapped, her sacrifice is less and less rewarding. The people for whom she sacrifices do not, in general, share her devotional sense of duty and, therefore, show no gratitude for the sacrifices made without their consent. 

Este «martir voluntario» debe comenzar la ardua tarea de examinar su propia vida, de descubrir lo que en verdad quiere y de saber por qué no fue capaz de asumir los riesgos necesarios para lograr antes su objetivo. 

Finally, she must act in the most direct and honest way possible, allowing others to be themselves, developing her own personality with the imperative need to plan not the fate of others but her own.